Contemplate deeply what I am about to say now. Grasp it and you will be out of the mind-trap for good!
You say you are trying very hard to be the Presence.
But That which is observing the effort to be the Presence, is that making any effort?
The flip-side of the ego is pure Awareness.
Flick over into the Awareness position in which the effort to be the Presence is seen in much the same way as you would watch a movie of yourself. The one watching the movie is separate from the image of himself which is unreal. There is a natural detachment present.
That which is observing the effort, can it be other than your Self, the living, unchanging Source?
Pay attention to yourself as the serene and formless Seer instead of identifying with the frustrated seeker.
Do you feel the difference?
Confirm your Reality here as the formless observing.
You are already the 'somewhere' you are trying to get to. Be clear about this in your Heart.
That's it - job done.